Death on the Nile (2022) - A jerky but entertaining cruise

Credit: allocine.fr

An almost discarded release alongside his heavily Oscar-tipped Belfast, Kenneth Branagh returns as the moustachioed Hercule Poirot in his latest Agatha Christie adaptation Death on the Nile, a stylish, sultry, CGI-ed trip to Egypt during which a cast of A-listers find themselves caught in the middle of a puzzling crime scene. With the heavily-accented Poirot at the forefront, Death on the Nile merges glamour, back-stabbing, riches and greed in an adaptation that is, despite its various downfalls, nevertheless enjoyable to watch and amusing to pick apart.

Six weeks after witnessing young Jacqueline “Jackie” de Bellefort (Emma Mackey) introducing her fiancé Simon Doyle (Armie Hammer) to her friend Linnet Ridgeway (Gal Gadot), Poirot runs into the latter two on the day of their wedding in Egypt. At first begged by Linnet to keep an eye on Jackie – who has followed them and lurks in the shadows, rejected by lover and friend alike – Poirot is then invited onto their wedding cruise, where he meets fellow guests Linus Windlesham (Russell Brand), Linnet’s ex-fiancé, Marie Van Schuyler (Jennifer Saunders), Linnet’s godmother, and her nurse Mrs Bowers (Dawn French), and his old friend Bouc (Tom Bateman) and mother Euphemia (Annette Bening). An exceptional cast cladded in exceptional costumes, the cruise takes a turn for the worst when a tragic murder takes place and Poirot’s vacationing is abruptly cut short.

Though this is perhaps Christie’s doing more than Branagh’s, the first forty five minutes of Death on the Nile are long-winded, featuring amongst other unimportant details an origin story for Poirot’s moustache that unfortunately doesn’t quite fulfil the pathos effect. Perhaps as amusing as the Belgian detective’s obsessive compulsions and quick wit is no doubt Branagh’s inability to put on a convincing accent, transforming instead into a caricature of Christie’s famous character. The opening in the trenches during the Second World War is not so much unhappy – as it was no doubt intended – as it is dramatically over the top, a hospitalised Poirot lamenting that he heroically saved his whole troupe, “but not his capitaine”, and turning to reveal, almost comically, the ghastly scar that sparks the growth of his moustache.

Credit: allocine.fr

From then on, Death on the Nile is a series of character introductions, of which there are so many that they might as well have been cardboard cut-outs of the actors, and scenes featuring either uncomfortable, Dirty Dancing style grinding, or Gadot and Hammer getting it on in public. This means that when the murder does finally occur, Poirot only has a solid hour left to figure out who is responsible. Discoveries are rushed, props on the crime scene are scarce, red herrings are accused then quickly discarded. There is something about Death on the Nile’s structure that is heavily unbalanced, at times focusing more on the backstory (a strange, side investigation involving Bouc and his lover Rosalie, played by Letitia Wright) than on the main plotline, on Linnet’s glamorised paranoia than on the signs leading up to the murder. Efficiently excluded from promotional interviews and only briefly featured in the trailer, Hammer – in his last film role to date – also destabilises the film’s energy, as recent allegations against him disturb and conflict with his character.

And yet this is still not enough to give Death on the Nile an inherently bad name. Despite its holes, its instability, its lack of rhythm, it remains an entertaining experience if anything, using to its advantage actors whose performances are varied and profitable from an audience demographic point of view, from the Saunders and French duo to Sex Education’s Maeve Wiley, alongside the excitement of the murder mystery genre’s interactive aspect. At the heart of it, despite an uneasy accent and at times jolty directing, shines Branagh in all of his glory, a joy to watch, a true gentleman who charmingly casts off questionable décor and one-dimensional characters with a flick of his moustache.